It has been a long time since last I had a blog. So much has happened since then.
Last April my husband had been diagnosed with Pulmonary Fibrosis which is a progressive scarring of the lungs. By May he was continuously on a small dose of oxygen. As the disease progressed the O2 had to be increased. His movements became limited because of this, but we still made it out for dinner at Montana’s for our 25th anniversary. Plans for our summer had to be changed as lugging around many tanks of O2 over a long period of time was prohibited. People came to see us at our home. In August he was walking from the parking lot near old Victoria hospital, but by September that was impossible. Going up the ramp was problematic as well.
This was when I stopped giving Reiki to clients at Wellspring and teaching about Chronic disease and Chronic pain with South West Management. My focus had to be on family.
For our thanksgiving, family came from Barrie for the weekend. This included my son Jay, wife Shea, and their girls, our Grands Charli and Kennedy. The girls helped me put up the Christmas tree as I had a feeling Jim would not make it to then.
Unfortunately, I was correct. On October 18th Jim got admitted to Victoria hospital with pneumonia. He was there for 3 weeks. He was not only on high doses of O2 but multiple broad-spectrum antibiotics.
Our niece and her husband from Taiwan made it in time to visit Jim in hospital. There was not much physio so his walking deteriorated significantly. So many amazing staff to help him out. Relatives and friends from far and wide came to support us. They determined that he was palliative and sent him home where he got nine days to be with his family, friends and beloved dog Bella who never left his side.
The level of care at home was wonderful. Doctor in daily, nurse in several times a week and PSW’s there twice a day. All supplies including a medical bed and special mattress were provided. Medications he needed came right to the door. His O2 level got to 20 litres and he still wasn’t able to breathe.
The Doctor gave him multiple drugs to help him out on this his last day, November 17th, 2024.
There were ports in 4 areas so that he could receive meds painlessly. Family was there and gave me time to nap and eat as I knew it would be a long day and night. He passed quietly at 1040 p.m. Before he departed, I asked him to let me know he was o.k. I sat quietly with him before calling the nurse who would get the ball rolling re next steps.
As many of you know, even while grieving you have so much to do e.g. Pensions, bank, investments etc.
I had two angels who helped me out. 
One was a burley guy at Service Canada who spent 90 minutes helping me get all the pensions and death certificates figured out.
My other angel was at Service Canada transportation where she had helped us a few weeks earlier to get my name put on Jim’s vehicle. She even filled in all the forms for us, and afterwards got just my name on the licence. I brought her a card as she went above and beyond to help us out.
There are so many people out there who are willing to help you out.
Many friends came to visit Jim at home before he passed.
Sitting on our couch they had great conversations. My daughter and granddaughter who I trained in Reiki were able to support us both from the East Coast. I dislike cooking so had asked for food! My freezer has kept me going for months on their generosity.
I have several friends who called me often or came over to see how I am doing. It has been a roller coaster ride for sure. You never know when it hits you that Jim is gone. Last week I joined a grieving group and I think it will help.
Jim’s celebration of life was in January. At first, I was reluctant to do this, but now I am grateful for the encouragement to do so. Over 60 people showed up to celebrate with me. Family, friends, and family from my Ex-husband as well. He passed in December! Food from OutNBack was delicious. People came even though there was a bad snow storm! I was master of ceremonies and gave a short speech. Jim’s best friend Tony gave a summation of their 40 years together. Incredible time, with so much love and support.
I did a major cleaning in Jim’s office. He collected so many things e.g. Star Wars ornaments, planes, motorcycles and his big collection of knives and swords. His nephews shared that collection. His office wall was bare so I got some help from a friend to make a feature wall in a beautiful blue. Avro Arrow framed prints and his own art went up on the feature wall.
I had a Snowbirds picture framed and is proudly with the Avro Arrows. Many clothes went to relatives and Anova. I had a wonderful friend Matty, friends with Jim’s nephews, come and help me out with computer, printer, phones etc. So grateful as these were things that Jim always did.
Remember earlier on when I asked Jim to connect with me.
Well, he has in spades. I have small ornaments of a bear bride and groom. When I woke up one morning shortly after his passing, the groom (always facing the bride) and turned around and was almost touching a picture of my parents! A shiny new penny was on his seat on our couch. Some wonderful person gave me a music box which sang the song Pennies from Heaven. Channels on the car radio change while my hands are on the wheel, and so much more. I was grateful that he found a way to let me know where he was and that he was o.k.
I am not ready to do monthly blogs just yet as I have so much emotional healing to do and also many physical issues. I appreciate each and every one of you who have been with me since 2012 telling you about my life and adventures.
Stay strong, elbows up and celebrate the True North Strong and Free of our beloved Canada!
Sue