Well August turned out to be a remarkable month in so many ways. I finally got to meet the newest members of my daughter’s family i.e. the twin baby girls. It was exciting to finally be able to hold them and as it turned out, I was able to feed them a few times, as well.
They are the smallest babies that I have ever held. Their little bodies were clasped to me on some of the hottest days of summer. They are little heat factories that had the sweat pouring off my forehead! I totally loved their scrunched bodies and their tiny little legs, which are now starting to fill in.
They both suffered from reflux and had to be constantly observed for regurgitation and choking. Not much sleep in this household as they only settled on my daughter. They are starting to smile now, and that makes a whole world of difference. My older Grandchildren helped with the soothers for the babies. When I asked my 4 year old granddaughter, “How are the twins?” She said, “They cry a lot” and indeed they do!
My daughter and her husband have been able to ask for help from the community e.g. to hold one of the babies while the other is in a Beco on one of the parents. Chores still need to be done and lots of wash loads daily. The neighbours have helped with taking the eldest two for walks. When they say it takes a community to raise a child—they were not kidding.
This reminded me of how often when we are feeling down, or overwhelmed in life and do we ask for help? Usually not very often! Why is that? Do we feel unworthy, or that we “should” be able to manage. Others have handled similar situations, so I “should” be able to do this! I know as a Nurse, I have often felt it is something I know in dealing with clients; therefore I “should” be able to apply this to myself. There are times we all need help. You would be amazed by how many people who are willing to help us, if we only would ask.
I did ask for help from my community over the past couple of weeks. I had to as I was struggling to come to grips with the sudden death of my friend Karen. I had talked with her on a Sunday, prior to visiting my Grandchildren out East. She was gone the following early Friday morning. I was so shocked, as was her family. She had been facing issues from cancer over the past year. She had just started back on chemo. Previously on her first round of chemo, she would come for Reiki treatments three days after her chemo. When she did this consistently, she had no nausea or diarrhoea. She enjoyed being able to relax and feel stress dissipate after the treatments. This latest chemo was a stronger version, so I believe she got caught up in the physical symptoms right away.
My friend Karen and I had first known each other as RN’s when working on the Addiction Rehab Unit. As retirement became a reality for both of us, we did more and more together. We had many outings and many meals on these outings. We were able to tell each other our dreams, plans and be honest about how we felt. It was a two way street, where support was given and received back and forth between us. Karen was an avid listener to all of her friends. She was loved dearly because of this. At her memorial service, more chairs had to be brought in to accommodate all the people. Her choir came to sing some of her favourite songs. She had been a member for over 30 years, and had travelled the globe and won many awards.
There is a hole in my life that was Karen. She believed in me and in my business of Reiki and Allergy Correction. She supported me when I gave my first speech. When I asked for help in her passing I had many people send me prayers and Reiki, which helped so much. I can think of her with love without crying constantly. I know that she dreaded the wrath of cancer. She valued her freedom to travel and visit her friends and family. Cancer would have held her back and made her a prisoner in her own home. So she left on her own terms, not even realizing that this was her journey home.
I have a picture of Karen and I taken in May of this year at Pinecroft, near St. Thomas Ontario. I was so glad that I have this, as it typifies one of our many adventures together—with food of course! I really hadn’t taken any in years. So a reminder to pause on your journey with your friends or family, and take that picture! You will never know how precious this is, until they are no longer with you. And, amazingly we both looked great in the picture—go figure!
Karen always let people know that she cared about them. When you would leave her home, there was always a hug and “I love you Suzy Bell” (her nick name for me) She would wait to wave goodbye as you pulled out of her driveway before her door was closed. That is my final image of her! Rock on Karen! We had a wonderful ride together. I hope you are enjoying the biggest choir ever! I love you too!